O My Lord,
whether I am joyful oram stressed or distressed and depressed,
it is all You and only You.
Whether I find You or don't find You,
You are always there,
I am just looking outside
-- in the wrong place,
at the wrong time,
-- by Your design,
increasing my sense of absence
and enhancing my bliss
at whatever tiny reflection
or revelation You bestow.
And You do this
in the here, and in the now,
so I can feel the drama of it all,
the melodrama of missing You.,
the strange soap opera of our lives.
The inevitable tragedy of our lives
all simply making Your light shine brighter
Your all-attractiveness all the more attractive
All the rest of it reflections,
deflections, poorly seen
and barely recognized,
but also You.
You are the writer of this play
just to see how I live it,
whether I get the rasa
or don't get it.
